frustrado

i have been trying to design some bookplates and notecards using my computer and find i have inadequate tools!! i perused the net seeking ideas for what kind of design software i'd like to have and fell in love with all the adobe packages, but the basic one was like 1200 bucks. this is not in my budget by any stretch of the imagination.
i've always been broke and i've always been acutely aware of a simple but profound difference between people who have money and people who do not. when people who have money get a wild hair up their bums to try something, they can just go do it. when people who do not have money get the same wild hair, they have to struggle and save and find something to sacrifice so they can slowly raise enough money just to try their idea. if a small thing goes wrong to throw a wrench in the process, people with money deflect the wrench with their wallet. people without it have their projects stalled long enough for the wrench to have babies and make some boomerang friends.
i'm not trying to whine--i don't have money as a result of my choices, i accept that...but it still isn't fair. the playing field was never level, was it? the people i know with money came from moms and dads with money and grammas and grampas with money.
anyways.
i'm going to launch my business and rodney's going to publish his book (and then another and another) until we've leveled the field for our kids, so when they get a wild hair i can help them shape it.